Responding versus Reacting

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When confronted with something new or unexpected, we have a choice; do we react, or do we respond? There is a distinct difference, which I’ll unpack below.

In new or unexpected scenarios, it is very common to react. This is most commonly visible in lashing out or responding with angst and stress. Our muscles tense, our voice is raised, and our entire being goes into a “fight, flight, or flee” mode. Our reaction to the stimulus often leaves us feeling far worse off than before the reaction. An alternative is to respond.

Lean In

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I’ve often advised people to “lean in”, to “eat that frog”, and to focus on addressing the thing that is most troubling them. Whether a conflict, a fear, or something else, leaning into it is far more effective at addressing the concern than is leaning away. I found myself offering this feedback more frequently lately, and found an opportunity to apply the feedback myself as well, to get over a fear. At this point I truly realised the ripple effect overcoming a fear can have, and how it opens ones eyes even more than anticipated.

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Categorized as Life

On Purpose

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For as long as I can recall, the phrase “on purpose” has been a colloquial phrase said to mean “consciously” (as in, “I consciously ate the piece of cheese” / “I ate the piece of cheese on purpose“). I’ve recently redefined “on purpose” for myself to mean (in simplified form) “with intention”, and with a broader definition which shaped my thinking more than I realised in the moment.

Now Here

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At times, we’ve all felt lost. Confused. Uncertain. Perhaps even a combination of all three. At times, we feel stuck. Stuck between thoughts. Between feelings. We’re stuck between where we’ve been, and where we’re going. At times, we feel as though we are “nowhere”. No where.

In these moments, our thoughts and feelings begin to rapidly bubble up, with our mind finding all of the creative ways it can to emphasize how “nowhere” feels.

Today, I’d like to re-frame “nowhere”, simply to “now here”. You are now here. In this moment. What brought you here is in the past, and is immutable and done. What is in your future is currently unwritten. What we know for certain, though, is that you are now here.

Take that moment, and embrace it. What could you do to feel differently in the next moment? How does it feel to take the current moment and feel it fully, knowing that the next moment could be consciously different, by your own design?

Reflect on what brought you to this moment, and how you can build on that, learn from it, and grow into the next moment.

Reflect on how it feels to be now here.

Enjoy

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To enjoy something or someone carries with it such a pronounced and clear meaning in today’s world. The dictionary definition of “enjoy”, described below, uses words such as “receive”, and “have”. Possessive words, often associated with material objects, things, possessions, and personal fulfillment.

en·joy

 (ĕn-joi′)

v.en·joyed, en·joy·ing, en·joys

v.tr.

  1. To receive pleasure or satisfaction from.
  2. To have the use or benefit of: enjoys good health.

During my morning reading, and while meditating on the concept of joy and enjoyment, I cross-referenced other “en-” and “em-” words (“embolden”, for example) and would like to propose an alternative meaning for “enjoy”.

To “embolden” someone with something is to impart it to them. For example, to “embolden someone with courage” is to give them courage. I believe the same can be true for enjoyment.

en·joy

 (ĕn,-joi′)

v.en·joyed, en·joy·ing, en·joys

v.tr.

  1. To give/impart pleasure or satisfaction to.
  2. To give the use or benefit of.

To “enjoy” something is to bring joy to that experience, rather than taking joy from the experience. Joy, like all other emotions, is a choice we can make consciously.

Today, I choose to impart joy with my day.

Meditation: Health & Clarity

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Continuing the practice of meditating on annual word themes (here’s the meditation for 2021 on “kindness” and “positivity”), below is 2020’s meditation, working backwards to fill in meditations for previous annual word themes.

Our words for 2020 were “health” and “clarity”.

Meditation: Kindness & Positivity

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Each year, my partner and I choose one word each. These words combined will be our theme for the year, woven into the fabric of everything we do, and attracted by our thoughts and focus on them. Our words for 2021 are “kindness” and “positivity”.

This year, I decided to evolve our process, and externalize the meditation I do on these words, both to crystalize it for future, and to deeper explore the thought process. These will be streams of consciousness.

Open source thinking and opening up opportunities

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As a creative, I like to identify interesting combinations of thoughts, and believe there is a connected-ness to all things. Thus, two seemingly unrelated topics, thoughts, or items can be combined based on the ways in which they are the same, and which they are different. Finding the common ground between two things, to my mind, is the definition of creativity. To this end, two experiences come to mind which I’d like to connect, under the banner of introducing an “open source” approach to things.

By definition, “open source” implies that the source code of a piece of software is visible to those who use the software. Thus, depending on the license the software is released through, the code can be tweaked and modified by the end user, to meet a new need. Open source software is often also developed in the open, which fosters a culture of transparency, collaboration, and trust between those using the software, who are often also the developers of the same. Two ideas in particular resonate for me, when considering open source; the considerations to be made during the development of the software, and the transparency and openness around sharing of ideas, concepts, and approaches.

Identifying root causes for fun and sustainability

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It seems to be that there are themes and patterns across several areas of life at the same time. What is seen as a recurrence in one area of life seems to come up in others. I’ve noticed this for several months, and this time around the concept of “identifying root causes” is coming up. I’m seeing a gaps which I believe a root cause analysis would fill, as well as sustainable results that would be created as a result of a proper root cause analysis.

Not to belabour what is most likely quite clear, a root cause analysis is the concept of diving deeper below the surface when presented with a circumstance/problem, and identifying the genesis of that circumstance, with the intention to resolve it. This would then prevent the knock-on affects of that root cause, thereby resolving the entire chain of circumstances from the bottom up, rather than from the top (surface issue) down.

Root cause analysis is extremely important in an engineering or product context. When something happens which affects the user of a particular piece of software, it is often more beneficial to identify the root cause and resolve that, instead of resolving the surface-level concern. This is true outside of engineering and product, as well.

There are several techniques one can apply to identify a root cause. One popular technique is the “5-why”. When presented with a statement, ask “why”. When presented with the response to that question, ask “why” again, and so on. Within 5 iterations of “why”, the root cause should at least become evident.

One such opportunity for identifying and addressing root causes came about recently, with the closure of my beloved primary school.

Creating and consuming- a pathway to clearing the mind

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There is an interesting tension for me, between creating something new, and consuming something which exists. I find this in email (the emails I send, versus the emails I read), blog posts (those I write, versus those I read), and in many other areas such as todo list items, code pull requests, etc. The principle applies almost everywhere. Creation versus consumption. Are these two sides of the same coin? Are they independent, and being grouped together by sheer chance? What is the net affect of going in one direction or the other? Ultimately, the driver behind this search is searching for opportunities to quiet and clear the mind, be it of ideas for creation, or the need and desire for consumption.

I hypothesize that we exist between these two states of creation and consumption at different moments in our day. I find I like to create in the mornings, and consume in the afternoons. Often, I end up not fully being aware of this, and split my day between switching between these two paradigms throughout the day. There is surely a net affect there, even if purely from the context switching.